In the pursuit of defining your values?
If I were to ask you your top ten values, what would you say? Would you say family, success and happiness or would you say adventure, freedom and creativity? There are no right or wrong answers, there are just answers that are right for you.
When we get real about our values, we can really start to understand the type of lifestyle that will suit us best. Our values dictate the environment we want to live in, the right partner, friendship circles and the right career choice. They are an essential part of what makes us tick, but how many of us give it much thought?
Take a moment to understand what values really resonated with you and try and come up with at least ten. If you struggle with the process, then think about what makes you angry or irritated, then so often the opposite is true for you, revealing a core value. For example, I cannot stand it when someone doesn’t thank me if I hold the door open for them - so therefore one of my huge values is manners and that rude person has gone against them and therefore I am suitably triggered.
If you think of all the things that get under your skin and make the red mist appear, it’s very revealing as to what makes you feel comfortable and happy. Disclaimer; this can also get addictive, like your own personal ‘room 101’ or ‘ick list’ once you start you may not be able to stop . . .
Once you have your ten values I want you to get really real with yourselves as to how often they show up for you and if you are getting your values quota. For example, a big value for me is adventure, however with restricted travel and responsibilities I haven’t been able to explore this value for a while. So, how can I work on this value and ensure it shows up for me this weekend?! What will resonate with me so that I feel I have had my adventure dose? It could be trying something new, being spontaneous or planning a trip in the new year.
Perhaps one of your core values is truth, but you are struggling to have that honest conversation, or you notice you give your power away within some relationships. If one of your important values is truth that’s not going to sit easy with you and its time to be brave and do something about it.
When we or other people in our life go against our values in our day to day life it feels horrible and to have a happy life we need to take action to ensure we stand in our values as often as we can by creating strong boundaries, understanding where they sit in our life purpose, and then remaining consistent with them. This demonstrates a clear indicator of your character and will natural keep those with an agenda at bay because you will have an energy that cant be tampered with.
When you can identify a missing value or a low scoring value it gives you the opportunity to work on it giving you far more happiness and fulfilment. It is also the process to understanding ourselves better and informing us on how best to design our lives. Once we have the piece of the puzzle we can start to build the picture.
Do let me know what values you are missing, want more of, or ones that you are really enjoying and getting the maximum from. I would love to know the steps you’ve taken to ensure they show up fully for you in the week ahead.